In Search of Oblivion: by John Touchton

Wednesday, Oct. 28: the Japanther show, at T.S.I. was where I was going to be; to tell this story through my own recollection, might take a bit of embellishment. It was one of those oblivion-seeking nights and I had broken a covenant with myself, deciding to mix liquor and energy drinks, which allows the body to continue raging after the mind has already waved the white flag. Arriving at T.S.I with a stomach full of Four Loco, vodka left over from the A.N.T.E. Up tournament, countless beer, and a Red Bull to boot, already had me foaming at the mouth. Where do I begin?
Let’s start with Chicken and Whiskey, which might have been a less lethal combination than the concoction of berserk I had already consumed. All I remember is that before they played, I was doing a mixture of blow and gunpowder in the bathroom with Macho Man Randy Savage. They call this “brown brown” in the African jungles, but he insisted on calling it “buff ice.” When I looked up from the broken mirror, lying on the floor of the men’s stall, Randy was gone. I assumed that he had pussies to pile drive and rap albums to record, so I didn’t question his disappearance. C. and W. had already started by the time I made my way to the dance floor, which had been turned into a slip-and-slide of beer, sweat, and possibly blood, as I’ve been told I hit my head more than once. Don’t worry though, my ears aren’t ringing anymore and they have only bled twice since that night. Just as they were finishing their set, some drunken asshole from the crowd flew onto the stage, knocking over keyboards like bowling pins, just to be carried off in a frenzied stupor.
I hadn’t seen Tough Junkie perform in a minute, so I was more than stoked to see him play; and lucky for him, I was there. If my memory serves me correctly, I was able to perform an interpretive break dance to his set, wooing old T.J., along with the audience. I have to say that I may have stolen the show, but Tough Junkie was good too. After the set, I went to the restroom in search of more “buff ice,” but instead found Fred Durst and Big Dunn having a rap battle, just like in the music videos. I think Durst was the victor, but my memory on the evening is a little hazy, so it could have been either one. It was a good thing that with every pulse, my body was pumping taurine, guarana, caffeine, and alcohol, because the night was fading and Japanther had yet to play.
The first time I saw Japnather play, I was in Bloomington, Indiana for the 2006, Plan-it-X Fest. I remember this night more clearly than the T.S.I. show. I had never heard of them before, but was not disappointed in their set, as their songs were infectiously poppy. Then I caught them at a house show last year in St. Augustine; the walls were lined with bobbing bodies, sweating profusely, which seems to be protocol at a Japanther show. Earlier this year, while in Brooklyn, I attempted to catch Japanther in their hometown at a warehouse space, called The Shank. I’m pretty sure they were selling booze under the table there, but that was fine with me. After a week of spending Florida-earned dollars in an economy much stronger than ours, I was happy to buy cheap anything. Although Japanther never showed up, for some reason I never found out, I did get to catch Brooklyn based hip-hop group, Ninjasonik, perform an entire set, free styling over Japanther songs. It was definitely a worthy consolation. This time, however… Well, let’s see if I can dig into the deepest pits of my black out. I think they covered some songs by The Cure; I do remember some crowd surfing and Lil’ Willy got hit in the nuts; more sweaty, beer slip-and-sliding occurred; and I don’t remember the ride home. How is that for a review?
Recollection is a fickle function of the mind. It can be the worst liar or the truth you never wanted to know. Although, I don’t remember much of what I’ve heard happened, the fact that I still feel like I got in a fight with Mickey Rourke makes it difficult to deny such allegations. If there are any disputes as to what I’ve claimed as absolute truth in this review, feel free to fill in the blanks via comments. Thank you.